The changing face of self-confidence


Our face is expose to the element on a daily basis, from the day we are born to the day we die. It is the most unique feature about a person. It the central organ to our senses and at the heart of our senses are the complex structure of expressions and emotions. Our sensory system include the vision, hearing, taste, speech and smell. The face holds 14 bones and its complex structural surface is full of intricate motion.

The face is crucial for our identity and our portrait to the outside world. It is the key for others to be able to distinguish us from one another. Its characteristic structures and expression are based on our subjective experiences from our culture, upbringing and ecology. This make the face the most important anatomical features to a person. It has long been the subject of mythology, religion, art, literature and media. It is the feature that most scrutinized, judged and stigmatized. It has long been an interest to physiognomy, which originated from Chinese Medicine around 2600 B.C where practitioners already developed the chi energy, yin and yang and the five elements.

The face change as you grow, as you experience events that traumatize and mark your face. The face changes shape, sizes and dimension as you gain wisdom, knowledge and life skills. It is forever changing. The face of confidence is an art that incorporate self-acceptance, self-awareness and self-actualization. It is a myth that you think you can ‘put on a confidence face’, the voluntary muscular twinges controlled by your true thoughts, feelings will give you away.

Embracing my Eastern traditions, I use physiognomy as an assessment tool to help me to decipher a client’s emotional states, read the lines on their face unlock events that they have experienced. My skills in therapy in corporate my Eastern traditions along with the Western practices of counselling and hypnotherapy.



Parkinson and Me

Block path

According to the BBC Health  and Parkinson UK many people hides their symptoms of Parkinson’s disease, for fear of stigma. Parkinson’s disease is a progressive neurological condition that currently has no cure but there are treatments available to help relieve the symptoms and maintain the quality of life you desire. These include supportive therapies (such as physiotherapy, psychotherapy, counselling), medication and, possibly, surgery.

People who suffer from Parkinson’s disease lack a chemical called dopamine because nerve cells in their brain have died. Dopamine is a compound present in the body as a neurotransmitter and a precursor of other substances including adrenaline, that helps control the brain’s reward and pleasure centers. It’s purpose is to help regulate movement and emotional responses, fueling our actions to obtaining rewards.

People with low dopamine level may be prone to addiction, where certain receptors associated with sensation seeking, or those risk-takers and those addicted to risks such as in the cases gamblers.

Symptoms of Parkinson’s disease will display as tremor, slowness of movement and stiffness. It can be shown behaviourally in lack of sleep, fatigue, pain, blank or vacent stare, eye problems, speech and loss of communication which may result in tantrums and outbursts. It can be result in mental disorder such as anxiety, depression, dementia, hallucinations and memory loss.

Although, Parkinson do not cause death directly, however, the condition will deteriorate over time and living with the condition can be difficult, accepting the condition can be difficult for yourself and those around you. Before you can expect anyone else to accept the condition, you must first accept the condition yourself. This is easy said than done however.

Learn about self-acceptance through talking therapy can be effective. Try to be positive and focus on what you want from your life and how you want to live with the disease can help. Get yourself educated about Parkinson’s disease and get connected with those of the same condition can help support you. Stay active and stay connected with friends, family and the community. Love those around you who support you and still love you. Laugh at yourself when you are loss words trying to communicate – if you can do all this, you can go on living your life the way you want (with Parkinson’s disease).


Stress Awareness


April has been host to Stress Awareness Month since 1992. Stress is widely used in everyday’s language to describe the body’s reaction to any change that requires an adjustment, action or response. The body react to the changes with physical, mental and emotional responses.

Surely stress is as normal as your breathing? Why is it that we rate stress in a negative light? We put ourselves through stress by putting pressure on the body, we do thing in certain way and when faced with change, we view the change negatively.

Similar to anxiety, stress can be positive in keeping you alert and ready to avoid danger. Stress is negative when you become overwhelmed with the challenges and without relief or relaxation can caused tension to stack up. Prolong stressful situation can lead to physical problems such as headaches, upset stomach, IBS, increase blood pressure, high blood pressure, chest pain, difficulty breathing, and sleep disorders. When under such stress, generally, people will turn to alcohol, tobacco, drugs, exercise, food and other addictive tendencies in order to temporary relieve their stress. Unfortunately, you are exposing your body to a different kind of problem.

Each and everyone of us has different level of stress tolerance, knowing and maintain your healthy stress level is ideal. Stress can be emotional and physical.

Symptoms of emotional stress include:-

  • Becoming moody, irritated, agitated, and quick to anger.
  • Feeling like you are losing control, feeling overwhelmed.
  • Difficulty relaxing and quietening the mind.
  • Feeling bad, anxious and lose interests in activities and others.

Symptoms of physical stress include:-

  • Low or lack of energy.
  • Lethargy, unable to sleep, sleep pattern is disrupted.
  • Upset stomach, aches, pain, IBS and nausea.
  • Chest pain, irregular heart beat, fast and racing heat beat.
  • Dry throat, lump in the throat, coughing.
  • Cold/hot sweat in hands, feet, and body.
  • Lack of libido and sexual or physical desire.
  • Prone to cold/flu and other illnesses as the body is run down.

As pressure is experienced regularly, creating many demands; you know that lots of pressure eventual lead to stress, how can you control the inevitable? How can you reduce the severity of stress? How can you prevent certain thing or someone pressing your stress button?

Recognize when you are stress is the first step – trying to keep a stress journal that consists of:-

  • Establish your healthy and unhealthy stress scale (1-10 or 1-100 etc).
  • The date, time, place that trigger stress.
  • What were you doing, who are you with?
  • How you feel (from the gut – the emotions).
  • What were you thinking at the time of stress  (from the head – the thoughts).

Keep your journal going for the whole of April and see the patterns of stressful event that with high rate and become aware of triggers to your stress.

Only you can take control and take hold of the stress button. Now that you are aware of your stressful situation, you can choose to change, that is if you want to change. In situation where you can change, do something different, try something new and behave in different way. Some example may include addressing to the person or situation that you are stress, temporary remove yourself safely from the situation, taking a 10 minutes breather. In situation that you cannot changes; such as being stuck in traffic or roadwork whilst running late for an appointment, you can choose to think differently about the traffic jam or roadwork – give some thought to the poor person in the accident or the poor person who is working to improve the traffic infrastructure. Perhaps relaxation and breathing techniques would be useful for you. Whatever you try, and you may have to try several ways to find the best coping strategies for you. Be kind and gentle to yourself when you are working through the different way to cope.

But if all else fail…..perhaps an intervention through counselling or hypnotherapy can help.