Published: January 31, 2016 by Patch Welling
Learn how to pace and synchronize your breathing to match the person that you are keen to get to know through hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy can be used as preventative therapy as well as treatment for many dad-to-day issues. Hypnotherapy is a form of relaxation using hypnosis to psycho-educate the unconscious for change.
Some people blushed and gets very embarrass when speaking to someone they fancy. Some people gets tongue-tied. Some people gets ‘hot’ or flushes.
In hypnotherapy, as you are taught to focus your breathing and through guided sensory suggestions, you can control your nerves when speaking to someone you like, someone in authority or even to someone you dislike. Even if you don’t like this person, you may need to get along in certain situation. You may even have to speak in public or give presentation, this technique can be useful to help calm those nerves.
Pacing your breathing and experience is paying attention and focus to the intuitions you have about others. It is about the present moment rather than jumping into the future thoughts that this person, you fancy, is your ideal mate. In order to pace, you need to understand your present state in order to build upon your desired state.
Enough of the technical jargon. Whatever your presenting, try this simple technique, used routinely in NLP to control your nerves.
• Pay attention on the inside. You will become more sensitive to your thoughts and feelings. The mores sure you are inside the surer you will show on the outside. You heard of the terms; the confidence comes from within? Pay attention to your intuition and how you feel about the person you are speaking to. How much do you want to get to know this person? How important is it to get on?
• Look into their eyes, not around their eyes, and not like staring or glaring at them. However, if they look away, you need to look away. Mirror their eyes movement. Look into someone’s eyes is an art, show interest and genuineness. Looking at someone’s eye and looking away is seen as seductive. Most girls know about the ‘bedroom’ eyes. Be sure of your intention as you may give out ‘wrong’ signals. If you are really besotted about the person, your eyes will show this. If you are happy, your eyes will show this.
• Match their body language, subtly. EG: when speaking to someone you like on a night out, and this person started to fiddle with his/her glass, copy their movement gently. Copy any gestures as well. Other gestures include smiling, open body language, leaning in towards each other etc. But try not to do it immediately or blatantly as this will block further communication.
• Match their tonality and voice volume. If the person that you are engaged in conversation is speaking softly, speak softer and lighter.
• Rapport building. As you pace the person breathing, eye movements, body language and tonality using the same phasing, you will soon develop a rapport with the person. As you have developed rapport through pacing and matching, you would have experience temporal amnesia as the night drawing to a close. You would have forgotten about your tongue-tied, flushed face and hotness. Your rapport is going so well, that you can now lead the other person into exchanging numbers possibly a date?